Into the World of Gintama
by Jalen Kun
Summary: "Why does the world have to be so dull?" Meet Len: a melancholic boy that just wants excitement and adventure. When his manga transports him into the world of Gintama, though, will it be everything he's dreamed of? Or will it be too real for him..? Male!OC / Self-insert
1. Into the World of Gintama

**Into the World of Gintama**

_Into the World of Gintama_

_Why does the world have to be so dull?_

I think this single thought as I stare dully at my food - fried fish and french fries, bathed in hot sauce. The same thing I have every night. Night after night.

You may say this universe has tons of secrets and surprises waiting to astonish me, but I doubt they'd even be exciting enough to put in the local _newspaper_. Sure, I get excited over tons of things, but even things I like get old after a while, and then I'm waiting for something else to act stupid over.

Yes, _stupid_, because the whole thing is repetitive and moronic. In the end, life is only a bunch of meeting and greetings, partings and goodbyes - with only a few really worthwhile things, mind you.

You might disagree with me wholeheartedly, and y'know, I think I'd probably like that. It honestly disgusts me how...how _bored_ I am of living life. Of living this boring life with no happenings.

...Yet, that's not the only cause of my melancholy.

Do you know how insignificant you really are? No, really. There are over a billion different people in the world. Over a gazillion. People say stupid things like, "you're one in a million," but wouldn't that mean there are a lot of people exactly the same as you, living the same exact life as you?

I think it does. And if I'm just one in a million, one speck of dust flying around in a house - which is an even smaller piece of dust compared to the rest of the world - then why bother with life? Oh, sure, your families will mourn your death and cry and grieve and all that unhappy stuff - but then that's one family out of a gazillion, and after your death the world will continue to spin and people will laugh and chat like nothing's happened.

...Are you finally seeing the point I'm trying to get across?

I want to be important. I...I want something out-of-this-world to happen. It may be selfish, but when I die, I want the world to...to not just continue on like I'm a piece of gum stuck under a table!

I want exciting adventures!

I want the world to revolve around me!

I want to be something special!

_And I don't want to be stupid_, I think as I stand up, grabbing the plate of food. _Because I'm just a stupid 14 year old boy having an early mid-life crisis._

I dump the plate of food in the garbage. Suddenly, I'm not so hungry.

* * *

Some people read to connect with the world, to better understand how the world really is.

I read to escape from it.

Reality _sucks_ - It's as simple as that - and I get so much joy and excitement from reading about people with strange powers, and from people falling into an alternate universe, and even from reading about Dystopian futures. _I want that life,_ I'd think to myself as I read.

But then I realize I'm not that important, and how impossible it'd even be to have ice shooting from your hands...or for you to wake up in a different universe.

I shake my head, grinning as I flip a page of my newest manga: Gintama. I've watched the anime, but the manga is still going on and it's such a good show that I just have to buy all the books from EBay.

I can only get two books at a time, so I simply decided to get the first volume and then the volume that continues from where the anime stopped off. I'm reading the first volume now, noting the things that're different and the things that're the same.

_...Why can't the world be like this book?_ I suddenly think, feeling melancholic again. I snatch the manga from off the bed and toss it at the wall, not caring if it makes a dent or not. I'm just too much in a slump to worry about useless things right now.

I turn over in the bed and stare at the white ceiling, not noticing the bright yellow light forming in the corner of the room. When I do notice it, however, I jump up and stare at it incredulously.

The Gintama manga is _floating_, a bright yellow aura around it. I stare at it for a few more seconds, not believing my eyes.

_What's going on?!_

The book starts to gravitate towards me, and that's when I really start to panic. "Mom! Da-!" I pause, feeling a sense of calmness overtaking me.

...Isn't this supernatural? Out of this world? Amazing, even?

Isn't this what I've been wishing for?

The book stops moving in the middle of my room and the light gets bigger, brighter. It gets so bright that it overtakes my room, and I have to shield my eyes.

This is it, I think, grinning albeit not being able to see. Something extraordinary is happening to an insignificant person like me!

Before I know it, everything is dark.

* * *

**Sakata Gintoki, 21**

"So, when are we gonna get work, Gin-san?"

The annoying cherry-boy continues to pester me, even after working here for a week. It's really annoying. In the time that he's been working at Yorozuya, we've only done one job, and that was to clean up some stinkin' lady's house.

With that dojo situation, I can tell why he's so eager to get money, but he needs to understand that working as a freelancer isn't really good pay. Horrible pay, actually. How many months am I late on rent..?

"Are you listening to me?!" The kid shouts. He has a very loud voice when he gets pissed - which is really everyday.

I wave him off, reading my JUMP comic for the umpteenth time. "Yeah, yeah. Work, money, prostitutes - I hear ya completely, Shinpachi-kun."

Shinpachi makes a face. "I didn't say anything about the last thing." He sighs. "Anyway, I've been here for a while-"

"A week."

"-and I haven't been paid yet. Just because you swung your sword around a bit, that doesn't mean the dojo's debt is paid off. I still need money."

I yawn, closing the JUMP and staring at him dully. He's sitting on one of the two couches in this place, while I'm sitting at my desk.

"Listen, if you need money, I think I saw someone paying for extra toes in our back alley."

"I don't just have _extra toes_ to chop off! I'm talking about a paycheck!"

I wave him off again, shutting my eyes and trying to catch a few z's. It's obvious we aren't getting a visitor today. Why not sleep?

"Stop waving me off like I'm some sort of fly!"

...

"Gin-san! Hey!"

...

"Hey! Stop ignoring me! Hey!"

...

"I SWEAR, IF YOU FELL ASLEEP-"

My eyes snap open. "No-one in this world could fall asleep to your loud ass voice!" I yell. Seriously, he's so annoying!

Before he can scream at me again, there's a knock at the door.

...A _knock_.

...At the _door_.

..._Our_ door.

Shinpachi's face lights up like a Christmas tree. "Coming!" He calls out, completely overjoyed. He runs to the door, and even I get up to see what idiot would come to us for help.

Shinpachi opens the door.

A teenager, no older than Shinpachi, is staring up at us in...shock? Admiration? Disbelief? So many emotions pop up on the teen's face that I have trouble understanding them all, but I do know he looks shocked.

I snort. He's the one who knocked. Did he not expect us? Was he gonna break in my house if we weren't here?

"Umm..." Shinpachi doesn't know how to really greet costumes yet. And I'm sure he wasn't expecting somebody so young. "We're the Odd Jobs... Would you, um, like to come in?"

"Nah, he just wants to stand outside," I mumble sarcastically. Shinpachi gives me a dirty look as the boy walks into my humble abode, looking around like he's never seen a house before.

...He's seen a house before, right?

...

This kid better not be a homeless boy wanting food. I hardly have food for myself, much less this twerp.

"Sit down. Right here." Shinpachi motions to one of the couches as he sits on the one right across. I close the door and sit beside Shinpachi, yawning and stretching my legs. Man, I'm tired.

"So whaddya need?" I ask bluntly. Shinpachi gives me another annoyed look, but I ignore him. Now that the kid's sitting down, I can really examine him.

He has neat, dark blue hair and bright yellow eyes that stare at the two of us curiously. His face looks child-like yet mature, no pimples and scratches of any kind. He's wearing a black kimono with red stripes at the sides and black, baggy pants.

He doesn't look homeless, I note as he begins to talk.

"Okay, firstly, are you two real?"

...

Shinpachi and I give each other a discreet look.

_He's a psycho. _

"Wh-What do you mean?" Shinpachi chuckles nervously, wiping his glasses on his shirt. "Of course we're real. Actually, I don't think that's something you ask someone when you knock on their door."

The teen doesn't look convinced. "Just tell the truth. If this is some sort of dream, then I can make the limited time I have here worthwhile." That doesn't sound suspicious at all.

"Listen, kid," I start. "We're real. 100% real, I promise. Now tell us what you need before we kick you out."

"Gin-san!" Shinpachi cries, glaring at me. I shrug. This brat doesn't even look like he has any money to give me.

He looks a bit convinced now, but not completely. Instead, he looks...excited?

"If this is my conscience playing a cruel joke on me, I'll be pissed. I honestly think I'm dreaming," he says, a smile breaking out on his face. "And I'm scared to pinch myself, because what if I wake up? I'll miss my chance at...at doing whatever!"

...Right.

The kid continues to ramble. Shinpachi leans over and whispers, "Gin-san, what...do you do when your client's a nutcase?"

I grin. "What would _you_ do? This'll prove if you're really fit to work here." I say this, because honestly, I don't know myself.

I'm more inclined on just kicking the boy out.

Shinpachi glares at me - _again_ - before turning back to the boy, smiling anxiously. "Um... We don't exactly know what you want us to do."

He grins. "We could go out and explore! Hurry, before I wake up or something!"

"Dude, you aren't dreaming!" I burst out, standing up from the couch. The boy continues to stare at me (in awe?). I sigh. "Listen. We're freelancers, meaning we do whatever - but for a price. Now, if you don't have any money with you, I think it's best you leave."

The teenager looks like he's pouting for a moment...before he goes into his pocket, checking for money.

"I don't have any money," he says slowly, but then he grins again. "But I don't need you guys to do anything. Can I just stay here until, well, until I wake up?"

"Sorry. No dementia patients allowed. There's a children's hospital not far from here..."

"Gin-san!" Shinpachi yells again, glaring at me in disapproval. I shrug. What else am I supposed to do? He doesn't have any money, he's freaking delusional, and I just don't have the patience for that.

Shinpachi sighs before looking back at the blue-haired boy. The kid doesn't even look offended by my words. Instead, he's _laughing!_ The nut-case...

"Um, what's your name, kid? And how old are you?" My employee asks, ever the professional.

"I'm 14," the kid answers after he's done giggling. "And, well...my name's..." The nameless teen looks up in thought for a second, before looking back at Shinpachi. "Len. You can call me Len."

"Len?" Shinpachi echoes. "Do you have a last name?"

"Uhh..."

Shinpachi looks over at me in a distressed way. I ignore the look. He wouldn't be so worried if he just kicked the kid out. It's not my problem anymore; I'm just a spectator.

"I can't think of a last name right now," Len suddenly says, smiling. "I'll probably think of one sooner or later."

"It sounds like you're making up a name."

"I am."

Shinpachi gives Len an incredulous look, while the boy just grins toothily. Man, was I such a brat when I was 14? He's so..._happy_. Like he's found gold or something. _Well sorry to tell ya, boy, but all you've found is plain 'ole Yorozuya Gin-chan._

...Ugh, I'm suddenly tired. But I'm not falling asleep with this demented boy around... He might be some serial killer.

I clap, bringing their attention to me. "Alright, listen up, Len." I don't even care to know his real name - if he knows it himself! "You don't have any money, meaning you're bothering us. We can call the cops for that, you know?" I wouldn't dare call the cops on this kid. If I have to, I'll throw him out myself. "My suggestion is you either give us business or leave."

For once, Shinpachi doesn't argue against me.

Len pouts again. "But I'm not awake," he insists, and I groan.

"You're not asleep either."

With a sigh, he leans back in my couch and stares at me. "So you're telling me I'm not dreaming right now?"

"Uh, yeah. That's what I've been saying since you walked in here."

"..." He looks really thoughtful now, staring into space.

Shinpachi sneaks his way over to me, whispering again. "Gin-san, I heard that insane people are highly volatile and easy to set off. I-I think he's planning on killing us, Gin-san!" Well, you'd be the first to die, Shinpachi.

"Umm..." The boy catches our attention again, smiling his cheery smile.

"What?"

"Before I wake up, can I atleast touch you?"

...

* * *

**Len, 14**

"And stay out!" Gin-san slams the door, leaving me outside.

I pout, staring up at the Yorozuya household. Gin-san kicked me out. Literally. Before I hit the ground, I was sure I'd wake up from this weird yet exciting dream.

I didn't, though.

My butt hurts, but not as much as it should. I don't think. It's not everyday I get kicked out of a house that's situated ontop another building.

It's also not everyday I have such realistic, long-lasting dreams.

...This is a dream, right? It honestly feels too real to be one. I can move as fast and consistently as I want, I feel actual pain, and I'm not waking up despite being in here longer than usual. Gin-san and Shinpachi also weren't acting very...dream-like.

If I was dreaming, they'd do everything I say. We'd go explore and do whatever I subconsciously want to do, 'cuz it's a dream. Instead, I was kicked out. Not to mention Kagura-chan wasn't there... I'm sure I'd subconsciously include her...

The doubt starts to cloud my mind, and I look down to my arm. It looks real. Am I really not dreaming? My other hand moves to hover above my pale arm. If I'm dreaming, then I can pinch myself and I'll wake up. Do I really want to wake up?

My hand gets closer.

Do I-

"Hey!"

I quickly look up, and a skinny old lady is standing over me, a cigarette in her bony hands.

Otose.

I get off the ground and smile, feeling the rush and excitement I felt when meeting Gin-san and Shinpachi. They acted exactly like they did in the anime...and they were _real!_ This isn't animated at all; everything is as real as it can be. Gin-san's red eyes, Shinpachi's nerdy glasses, the house itself. Everything is real and it just feels so...so _amazing_ to be here!

I'd want nothing more than to go explore - or do something adventurous!

Suddenly, I notice Otose yelling at me about something. I was so into my thoughts that I hadn't heard a word she said.

"Yeah, what'd you say?" I ask. It's impossible to stop grinning.

She twitches. "You didn't hear a single word I just said?!"

I shake my head. "Nope. Sorry."

She twitches again, and I can see her muscles flexing. Uh, is she mad..?

"What're you doing sitting outside my bar? As soon as I came out here, your face morphed into a giant grin!" Her voice lowers threateningly. "You better not be some sort of thief, boy."

A thief? Really? I'm not Catherine...

"I'm not, ma'am," I say, preventing myself from scoffing. My formal tone makes her loosen up a bit, but she still looks pissed. Why? What did I do?

"Then what're you here for?"

I point behind her, at the Yorozuya building. "They kicked me out."

She looks up at the building and scowls. "That moron..." She looks back at me and crosses her arms. "Why? What'd you do? What do you want?"

So many freaking questions... "I didn't have any money," I answer, before bowing in that Japanese way. "May I come in?" I really want to see how it looks in there in real life.

She still looks like she wants answers, but she doesn't pry, thankfully. Instead, she puts the small cigarette in her mouth before turning around. "Sure. But you'll have to leave before nightfall. That's when the drunk guys get here and I don't need a brat like you getting hurt in a bar fight."

She walks inside, and I follow, my smile getting even bigger. She has her moments, but she doesn't seem as hostile as she does in the anime. Honestly, all I see is a bitter old lady...with a soft spot, I guess...

Her bar looks...exactly like how it does in the anime. The only difference is the lack of men and Catherine's absence. Hm, I guess I'd subconsciously make her not be here. I don't particularly like Catherine.

I sit down on the tall chair while she goes off to do something behind the counter. I'm so into my thoughts - _ooh, I need to see the Shinsengumi next!_ - that I don't notice the small bowl of rice she placed on the table. I only notice when she smacks me across the head.

"Oww! That hurt!" I exclaim, rubbing my head. _Yeah, it hurt, and I didn't wake up. What's going on?_

"That's what you get for blanking out too much!" Otose scolds, looking down on me. "You don't have any money, right? Where do you live?"

I blink. "Uhh..." Usually I'd just say whatever, 'cuz it's supposed to be a dream, but my doubts are...really starting to get in the way of my judgement. How am I able to feel pain in a dream? How am I able to...to _think_ like this while I'm supposedly dreaming?!

You shouldn't be able to do these things!

That's when the reality of things all come crashing down. The floating manga, the bright light, the darkness - all of that was real. The manga...teleported me..._inside the manga!_ I'm _inside_ Gintama!

I'm in the Gintama world.

I'm _really_ in the world of Gintama.

And...I don't know how to actually feel about it.

* * *

**Author's Notes: Well... A few of you were asking for it, so here it is. The official remake of Into the World of Gintama! I know it's quite different from the original but whatever. Hopefully you all still enjoy it anyway. **

**Ah, and this story will be in multiple P.O.V's, so don't expect everything to be in Len's P.O.V. It will not. **

**Anyway~ bye-nii~!**


	2. Put Straight to Work

**Author's Notes: So... I guess I made a mistake with Gintoki's age... :3 **

**I could have sworn I read that somewhere he was 21...but whatever. I can't even find it anymore. All it says is that he's somewhere in the 20's...**

**So I'll be changing his age to 27, 'cuz why not? :c**

* * *

**Into the World of Gintama**

_Put Straight to Work_

**Sakata Gintoki, 27**

"KEEP IT DOWN, YOU IDIOTS!"

I stomp on the wooden floor a few times, hoping to get my point across. Ever since the sun fell, multiple men came in Otose's Snack Shop one after the other. Now 90% of them are drunk and they're making too much noise! I can't sleep!

As I expected, they continue partying like they can't hear me—which they probably can't. "Goddammit," I mumble, grabbing my wooden sword and stomping to the door. If Shinpachi was still here at this time, I'd get him to go down there, 'cuz he's obviously a better yeller than me. He went home, though, disappointed there weren't any jobs and, in return, money.

_Children these days_, I think. _All they want is money, money, money. They don't realize the hard work you have to put in. Seriously..._

I open the sliding door, ready to raise hell down there...

...but curled up in a ball in front of me is that Len kid. He's shivering—it _is_ cold out here—and I notice him whimpering and sniveling. What's wrong with this brat?! And why is he doing this in front of my house?!

"Hey," I call out a bit irritably, gently nudging the kid with my foot. He just whimpers in response, not showing me his face. "Hey. Kid, what's up with you? Got dumped by your girlfriend?"

He whimpers more, before sniffing and hiccuping. It's a good bet that he's crying...

I continue talking: "Well, Mama always told me to focus on my school-work than girls, so—"

"That's not it," he finally speaks, cutting me off. His voice is cracked and high.

"What is it then?" I sigh, reluctantly sitting on the ground beside him. "You can tell good 'ole Gin-san—for a price, of course."

"I don't have any money..."

I put my hand to my chin in mock-thought. "Hmm... Then I guess you'll have to pay me back somehow." Now that I think about it, why's this kid out so late at night? Isn't his parents worrying about him?

And why cry in front of my house, dammit?

There's a long, long pause. I'd think he fell asleep if he wasn't sniffing every once in a while. "...I'm not dreaming," he finally says. I prevent myself from groaning. This again? "I...I've been here too long. I feel pain. I...I know this isn't a dream. I even pinched myself and I didn't wake up!"

He abruptly sits up and stares at me, his bright eyes full of tears.

"...You're real," he whispers, looking down. "This whole world is real, and—and I'll never be able to go back to my old one. I just know it. There's no way..."

He stops talking for a while, and I sigh, leaning against the wall of my house. What I've got from that is that he thought this world was fake or something, but now he knows that it's real and he's freaking out or whatever. Totally lost as to why, though.

"...And y'know—" He sniffs again. "—just hours ago, I wanted to be here. I...I was so sick and bored of life, and I wanted exciting adventures and...and for cool and fun things to happen. Something out of this world, y'know?" He looks up at me again, a melancholic expression now on his face. "And I think...I have that opportunity now. I'm just...conflicted between if I like it or not..."

I sigh. Again. "Y'know, with the Amanto basically taking over Edo, I don't know why you want something more to happen." He chuckles a bit, but it sounds forced and really dry. "I'm serious," I continue. "...and you're just gonna have to adapt to the way your life is. We all can't have what we want, but us humans do one thing well, and it's to adapt. So you'll adapt...and that's all you'll do. It's all you can do, sometimes..."

I know I've had to adapt. Losing a war basically makes everything so...pointless. Why fight if, in the end, we were gonna lose? Why lose friends—why _die_—if the ending is always the same? Everything I fought for, and everything I lost... It all seems so freaking pointless sometimes.

I haven't given up hope, but at the same time I have.

That's why I'm adapting. Being a freelancer, I've had to adapt to do basically everything. I use to fight—to _kill_—and now I'm cleaning bathrooms and building houses.

I'm basically the king at adapting.

But that doesn't mean I like it.

Len looks up at me and grins sadly, wiping the tears out his eyes. "Do you really believe that, Gin-san?"

I stand up, stretching my stiff muscles. "Yep." I don't completely comprehend this kid's problem, but I hardly care anymore. He seems content, and that'll be that. I'll probably never see him again. "Now go home, brat. Bothering an old man like me..."

I turn around to walk back inside my house, but I suddenly feel something tugging on the sleeve of my kimono. I look back and realize it's Len.

"What?"

"You're a freelancer, right? The Yorozuya...right?" He looks like he's holding back the biggest grin. Did my words seriously bring him out of his slump that fast?

"Yeah, what of it?"

He let's go of my robe and digs into his pocket. I watch in curiosity as he pulls out a 500 yen coin, handing it out...to me? That's enough to buy JUMP and some milk...

"You'll do anything for pay, you say," he says, and now he's grinning, his yellow eyes sparkling. "Then take this money and let me live here with you. Thanks~!"

He drops the coin in my hand and slips past me into my home, laughing.

I stare at the money in my hand for a few seconds, the gears in my head churning.

"...**_EEEEHHHH?!_**"

* * *

**Shimura Shinpachi, 16**

I slip on my sandals and open up the sliding door, letting the bright sun in.

"Bye, sis. I'm going off to work." I say this in a bored, depressed tone. I don't even think I can call going off to the Yorozuya work. Working in that small restaurant was work; I'd actually get paid doing that.

But that silver-haired bastard just had to ruin it. He's basically ruined my life!

Does he really think that giving me some half-assed job like—like being a _freelancer_ makes up for getting me fired? Not to mention I've only done one freaking job since I've started working there (and I didn't even get paid for that). All I do every day at the Yorozuya is scream, clean, and watch Gin-san fight with our landlady, Otose.

Sis smiles sadly at me. She knows how hard it's been for me, having to deal with that lazy bastard day-in and day-out.

"Keep it up, Shin-chan," she says. "Just wait a bit longer. I'm looking for a job now. If things don't pick up over there, you should start searching for another one." I should do that, shouldn't I? But it's not that simple. It's never that simple anymore.

If I could afford it, I'd quit right now. But I'm still hanging on to hope that...that something good will happen.

"Yeah," I say sullenly, walking out and closing the door behind me. I sigh. I don't really wanna, but I know I'm gonna have to overuse my voice today. Just a feeling.

I walk through the human/Amanto-filled streets, my face only being described as deadpanned. I use to be freaked out by the aliens that've taken residence in Edo, but now I hardly bat an eye towards them. And when they wave, I try to smile and wave back, because you don't want to get an Amanto on your bad side.

You just don't.

After who-knows-how-many minutes of walking, I find myself standing right in front of Otose's Snack Shop. And situated atop the snack shop like a leech is the Yorozuya. My own personal hell for who-knows-how-much longer...

I walk up the wooden steps up to the sliding door of the Yorozuya. With another sigh, I push open the sliding door. "I'm here-"

"Shinpachi-kun! Saaave meee!" The blue-haired teen from yesterday—Len, I think—screams for help at the top of his lungs. He doesn't really look like he needs it because of the giant grin on his tanned face. Gin-san's on top of the kid, his fists pulled back like—like he's going to punch him!

"Gin-san!" I rush over and grab the man's elbow, effectively stopping the punch in time. "What the hell's wrong with you?!" Why's this kid here anyway?!

He looks over at me and glares the nastiest glare I've ever seen, his dead-fish eyes flashing in rage. I'm almost taken aback. Whatever Len did, was it really that bad?

"**Let go of me, Shinpachi,**" he snarls. "**He drunk my strawberry milk.**"

...Of course.

"SO _WHAT?!_ STOP BEING A SELFISH OLD MAN AND GET OFF HIM!" With all the power within me, I swing Gin-san off of the teenager and at the wall, making a huge human-shaped crack.

"Gah!" Gin-san coughs overdramatically, falling down to the ground in a heap. "Strawberry milk-sama," he mumbles shakily. "I'm...sorry..." And with that, he's seemingly unconscious.

I huff, hands at my hip. "Idiot."

"Wow, Shinpachi," I hear Len drawl behind me. "You've surprisingly got the strength of a thousand slaves."

I turn to look at him. "Thank...you..?" He's only two years younger than me, but it somehow seems like I'm years above his maturity level.

But, it's like that with Gin-san, too.

"Why'd you drink his strawberry milk anyway?" I ask, plopping down on the couch. He gets off the ground and jumps lazily onto the opposite couch.

"Well, considering there was nothing else in the refrigerator," he starts. "What was I suppose to do? A boy's gotta drink, y'know?" There's something in his bright eyes that tells me there's more to it than that, but I don't pry.

Not much. "A-Anyway, what're you doing back here?" After Gin-san viciously kicked the kid out yesterday, I thought I'd never see wind of him again.

He shrugs. "Otose-san gave me 500 yen, and I gave that to Gin-san to let me stay here for the time-being." 500 yen? Really, Gin-san? Are you _that_ freaking cheap?

"Uh, why do you need to stay here..?" I know I'm prying too much now, but I'm really curious. Where's his house, his family?

"I don't got nowhere to go, obviously. C'mon, _think_, Shinpachi!"

..._Save your voice, Shinpachi. Don't waste it on this guy..._

"But don't you have family? Heck, even staying over a friend's house would be a lot better than here..."

"I asked him that already. He said he doesn't have anyone to go to. I redirected him to the children's hospital, but he just won't leave. He's like a cockroach." That's Gin-san, finally off of the floor and butting into our conversation. He's not even in his regular clothes yet.

"SAYS THE PARASITE THAT CREATED THIS STUPID PLACE!"

"Y'know, Shinpachi, bad attitudes aren't welcome in the Yorozuya! I suggest you walk outside and come back in with a smile on your face!"

"Shut up! Of course I have a bad attitude, considering I'm working for the man that's ruined my life!"

"You didn't have a life for me to ruin! It was already shit before I even entered!"

"_Ahem_." Len coughs into his hand, signaling for us to be quiet. He smiles when we do. "Good. I don't really like this tension hanging around the Yorozuya. I think we should do something today...instead of staying in this place."

Gin-san sighs irritably, leaning on the kid's head with his elbow. "Ever the adventurist, aren't ya? Sorry, but no. I'm about to go to the store and buy more JUMP—"

"What about my paycheck?!" He's always buying JUMP! He needs to be giving that money to me! What about me?!

He waves me off, walking away. "I'll pay you soon, Shinpachi. Just chill, 'kay?"

"I'M NOT GONNA CHILL WITHOUT MONEY IN MY HA—"

_Ding dong. _

...That's the door. Someone rung the doorbell. We might have a client! I may just get paid yet!

"Coming!" I call out, giving Gin-san a smug smirk. He frowns a bit, but I ignore it, already rushing to the door. The person rings it again, right before I slide it open.

An old lady with poofy gray hair and a twisted smile—that's the client, apparently. Well, she may be rich, so I'll treat her as such.

I smile. "H-Hi, welcome to the Yorozuya..." I really need to work on my greetings. "Come in. We'll be happy to help you, ma'am."

"Of course, sonny," says the lady, her twisted smile never leaving her face even as she walks inside. Len's the only one in the front room—I still have questions for him—as Gin-san's changing his clothes in his room, I presume.

"Hiya!" Len chirps enthusiastically, grinning his cheery grin.

"Well now, you're a handsome young man," the old woman muses, sitting on the couch opposite to Len. "What's your name? You're working here for the summer?"

"My name's Len, and no, this is a full-time job—well, I think so." What does he mean by that? He doesn't work here! "And thanks for the compliment." Why's he acting so sweet and kind?

I sit down beside him, smiling kindly at the lady. "Um, our boss is in the other room right now..." _Getting dressed,_ I don't add. "He'll be here soon. We'll be happy to take your request now, though." Please have a real request to give us...

"Oh, okay." The lady seemingly gets comfortable on the couch. "I'll wait for your boss. It's...a pretty long story, if you catch my drift." Ah, well, the longer it is, the more money she may pay.

Sis and I really need this money.

While the old woman's staring off into space, I take this time to question the teenager beside me once more.

"Len," I whisper. "What're you talking about? You don't work here, right?"

He stares at me again with those bright sparkly eyes. "Yep, I work here now. Yesterday, Gin-san and I came to an agreement—"

"**I'm ready!**" My idiotic boss interrupts, storming into the room. When he sees the lady, though, his tone softens. "Yes, ma'am. How may I help you?" Don't act like you didn't just make a fool out of yourself!

After the greetings and whatnot—her name's Tanaka Megumi—she begins telling the story.

"Yes, well... I have reason to suspect my son is...doing stuff with girls." She says this with a completely straight face. I raise a brow, Gin-san hums, while Len just looks as excited as he usually does.

"Um, how old is your son, ma'am?" I ask.

"14."

Gin-san whistles slyly. "Man, he's doing more things than 'ole Shinpachi here, and he's two years younger."

"WHAT?!"

"Gin-san, _everyone's_ doing more things than Shinpachi."

"SHUT UP! YOU TWO HARDLY KNOW ME!" So what if I've never dated anyone?! That's not strange! I-I'm just waiting for the right person!

The lady continues to explain: "My son's 14, yes, and I think he's doing stuff with the girls his age. Y'see, one day he brought a young girl home with him and they went to his room. She left really late. He's also always on the phone with different girls, and he's out late at parties all the time. When he comes back, I notice blonde hair on his clothes, and he smells like perfume." She sighs melodramatically. "I want to go confront him about this behavior, but I'm not entirely sure if he really is doing...things with them. He's going to a party again tonight, and I was wondering if the Yorozuya could maybe spy on him while he's there..?"

This is a...strange request. Actually, I'm wondering why this lady that looks over 60 has a 14 year old child. That's unusual...

Gin-san groans, to my utter confusion. "Man, he's a growing child. Boys will be boys and going out to parties will be the things they do. If he meets a cute girl that likes him, then well...they'll be doing some stuff, that's for sure."

"GIN-SAN!" I scream, glaring at him. I know this is a stupid request, but he's ruining our chance to get paid! This may be our last client!

The silver-haired bastard ignores me. "Just talk to him about it. 9 times outta 10 is that he'll be all embarrassed, but I guarantee you that he's at least kissing—if not the other thing..."

An aura of hate forms around me, probably suffocating Len beside me. I don't care, though. Who knows how much money this lady had? Now we'll never know...and I'll never get paid...and Sis and I can't save the dojo...

"That's...a shame..." Tanaka-san sighs. "I would've paid you, of course, but I just wanted to be 100% sure." Out of nowhere, she holds a brown box. She opens it up, just slightly, and I can _see_ the gold shining already. "Oh well... I'll spend my money elsewhere, I guess..."

"**A-A-ACTUALLY, I THINK YOUR IDEA WAS MUCH, MUCH BETTER!**"

Gin-san suddenly looks flustered, his face red and his eyes sparkling crazily. Even Len stares at the box in distinct want.

Huh? Me? Well... You can be sure that I agreed to doing the job. I agreed wholeheartedly.

* * *

**Len, 14**

The (possibly) demented old lady leads us to her home, beaming at us with no teeth in her mouth. "My son doesn't leave until late, so he's out hanging with his friends right now! I think it'd be great if you three could—oh, I don't know—go make his acquaintance?"

Gin-san nods, probably not even listening. Ever since he saw that money, he's been nodding and mumbling to himself. Shinpachi simply smiles and goes overboard to please the lady, lest she refuse to give us the money or something.

Honestly, I'd be pretty disappointed if that were to happen. I've only been living with Gin-san for one night—_ohmygod I'm actually living with Gin-san!_—and even I can see how impoverished he is.

Not to mention I'm starving. I need food, dammit!

And tea. Yeah, definitely tea.

"There he is," says Tanaka-san, pointing to a group of kids that look my age. She did say he was 14.

Right now, we're hiding behind some garbage cans, spying on the teenagers. Passerbys give us weird looks, but I just grin geekily at them. I'm in the Gintama world, I'm living with Gin-san (and later Kagura-chan), and now I'm apart of the Yorozuya. I'm feeling so happy! I feel ecstatic!

Sure, Shinpachi and Gin-san has some unresolved tension, and this lady is acting pretty stupid...but I don't care. I'm in the world of Gintama for who-knows-how long, and I'm gonna have fun!

"So," the lady muses. "Who's gonna go talk to them?" Definitely not m—

"Len." Both Gin-san and Shinpachi stare at me, their expressions dulled. I blink...before realizing exactly what they're doing.

"Oh hell no! You are not forcing me to go associate with them!" I scream, waving my arms around for effect. The people walking by give us even more strange looks, but this time I just ignore them.

Shinpachi gives me a reassuring smile. "Calm down, Len. You're the same age as them, so why not?"

"Because I don't know them!" I insist. "What's the point of meeting them anyway? We'll just spy on him and see if he's...doing stuff or not..." I look away uncomfortably. I really don't want to act friendly with them, and then in the end they realize I was just doing a stupid job.

Besides, those three remind me of how I was with my two best friends. I've done well pushing back my emotions...but I don't wanna open up a can of worms. If I see even the tiniest resemblance to my friends, I may go into a depression that I don't want to get in.

"But we can make this a whole lot faster if you question him on it now," Gin-san explains, his face and voice serious now. "Just go do what you have to do, okay? We'll be cheering on you, okay, Len-kun?"

I stare at him. I understand where he's coming from, but I still don't wanna do it. I may not even like them...

A few seconds pass with us staring at each other...before Gin-san sighs, looking away. I'm sure I've won until he starts talking.

"Fine. Don't do it, brat," the silver-haired man says. "Just know that you won't get none of the money when we complete the job."

My stomach growls. "...Fine! Fine, I'll do it!" I really need that money. "So what do I have to do? Just straight up and ask him?"

I notice Tanaka-san is staying strangely quiet. Shouldn't she be helping—just a bit?

"No, you'll befriend them and have them bring up the party with you. And if they don't, you try and casually bring it up," Shinpachi explains in that nasally voice of his. "At the end of this, you should either have his answer on girls or the address of the party."

I wonder why Tanaka-san doesn't know where the party will be held. Can't she just straight up ask him? She's his mom for Pete's sake.

Gin-san gives me a humorless smile. "If you come back with absolutely nothing, you don't get paid." I grumble obscenities in response.

Just like that, I'm put to work.

...

"...H-Hiya!" Like a switch being flipped, I go into my happy-go-lucky mode. It's not that hard—well, as long as I remind myself how blessed I am to be in the Gintama world!

The boy I'm focusing my attention on has spiky brown hair, and he's wearing a bluish-gray kimono. The other two look non-important—one has an ugly bowl cut and the other has a Pinocchio nose. Nothing like my friends from back home, that's for sure.

"...Hey?" The boy with cool spiky hair practically asks, tilting his head. "What do you want?"

Grin on full force, I answer, "You three look cool! Wanna be friends?"

"No." Pinocchio sneers. "We don't even know you. You look weird." Cool Spiky Hair Boy gives Pinocchio a dirty look, but I just smile.

"Let me rephrase that," I say, pointing to Cool Spiky Hair Boy. "_He_ looks cool. Not you. So go away."

Bowl Head Boy steps in, frowning. "You can't just come over here and insult us!"

"I didn't insult you. I insulted Pinocchio." I roll my eyes, ignoring their glares. "Seriously, don't throw stones if you live in a glass house. I can turn both of you down if I wanted, so please just scurry along somewhere while I talk to my new friend."

Cool Spiky Hair Boy looks torn, but Pinocchio grabs him by the arm and pulls. "Hikaru isn't your friend! And we're leaving!"

Before he can pull too far, I grab Cool Spiky Hair Boy's—_Hikaru's_—other arm. "Hikaru-kun is my friend, and he's staying with me." I can't lose this kid. The price is too great.

"G-Guys, guys!" Hikaru exclaims, pulling away from both of us. "L-Let go of me!" On instinct I let go, realizing that I'm supposed to befriend him, not kidnap him.

...I blame Pinocchio and Bowl Head. They pissed me off.

Hikaru gives the two idiots another dirty look before turning to me, smiling almost shyly. "S-Sorry about my friends...but my name's Tanaka Hikaru. What's yours?"

Pinocchio and Bowl Head both gape while I grin brightly, relishing in victory. I managed to befriend him without even trying! I'm so awesome!

"I'm Len!" I answer cheerily. I still haven't thought of a cool last name. "A-And...uh..." Crap! What do I say now?! "...I just wanted to be friends. I didn't mean to say that about Pinocchio and Bowl Head."

Bowl Head bristles. "You don't sound sorry!"

"Sheddup! I say what I mean and I mean what I say!"

"You're definitely not sorry!"

Hikaru chuckles, now smiling brightly at me, too. "Just ignore them. They're actually really nice when you get to know them." Sadly, I won't get to know them. This is strictly business and nothing else.

The thought makes my smile falter for just a bit...but then I regain my composure and smile again. "Anyway, I just moved here so I don't know anyone..." Grabbing at straws here...

"That's okay. You know us now," Hikaru tries to reassure. "Oh! I have an idea, actually! There's a party going on tonight. Why don't you come with?"

Both Pinocchio and Bowl Head gasp, and even I'm taken aback. D-Did he just ask me to go to the party with him? Was it that simple?!

I'm nodding my head before I even know it, completely excited. Not because of the party, though. Because I'll be getting paid yet! I'll be getting my Tea-kun and my food!

"O-Of course I'll go!" I'm still nodding dumbly. "I-I'm actually surprised you asked me..."

He smiles again. A really sunny smile that shows his whitened teeth.

"Well, we're friends, right?"

This spiky haired boy must be, like, a saint or something. Some blue-haired guy comes up, insults his real friends, and then tries to pull him away from his real friends. And he's still up for being that blue-haired guy's friend?!

Almost makes me feel bad that I'm just doing a job.

"Um, c-can you come here, Hikaru?" Pinocchio asks gently, almost whispering. The other boy doesn't even have time to answer before Bowl Head grabs him and they huddle up, talking fast in hushed voices.

Hikaru suddenly gets red in the face, and I hear him yell, "Well, if I don't try then I'll never know! You two wouldn't understand..."

...Well. That's kinda cryptic.

They continue whispering, and I'm tempted to just walk back over to Gin-san and company. Before I do, though, they all come back over to me, Pinocchio and Bowl Head smiling their obviously fake smiles while Hikaru's smiling an actually real smile.

...Well, I'm only supposed to get information from Hikaru. The other two are, well, unimportant.

Hikaru gives me the address for the party. I thank him profusively...and just to make sure I definitely get my share of the money...

"Hey, Hikaru?" I smile a convincing smile. "Do you have a girlfriend?"

He wasn't expecting that—I can tell. He literally flinches, his face turning crimson red. After a while of stuttering and whatnot, he looks down and gives an almost silent "no."

My grin undoubtedly gets bigger. "Oh, okay thanks." I might sound casual on the outside, but on the inside I'm dancing. I'm definitely getting that money! Definitely! Heh, we might not even have to go to that stupid party!

If he doesn't even have a girlfriend, then it's a 90% chance that he's not doing anything scandalous.

After chatting with them some more, I hear Gin-san doing some twisted sort of bird call. They've probably used up all their patience, and they want me back.

"Well, I gotta go get ready for that party!" I say. "What time does it start again?"

"At 8:30," he answers. I smile and thank him once again before leaving oh-so secretly to behind the garbage cans.

Tanaka-san's...fallen asleep. Shinpachi's the one holding her, looking annoyed but not at the same time. I can't really place my finger on it. Gin-san's staring at me dully, his red eyes blinking only once.

"So what'd you find out? You were gone for so long that I thought you'd stay with them."

Staying with them instead of you guys? I wouldn't even dream of it.

I tell them everything, from the address to his romance status and everything in between. Shinpachi smiles at me in relief—I don't think he had faith that I'd get the information—while Gin-san simply nods.

"Good job, Len-kun. I guess you'll be getting paid after all," the silver-haired samurai says.

I roll my eyes, jokingly flipping a piece of my blue hair. "Of course. I knew that acting class I took in 1748 would help me out."

Tanaka-san suddenly wakes up, immediately talking. "You three will still have to go to the party. I want to make sure." Gin-san and I groan, while Shinpachi just smiles tiredly—like he's done something!—and nods.

"I guess you'll be put straight to work, Len." Gin-san gives me a toothy smile. I blink, wondering what he means by—

Oh.

"Aw, come on! I don't wanna!"

You think they listened to me?

**Author's Notes: The party spy-thing will be on next chapter! A-And I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter! I like doing the multiple POV's, so I'll keep on doing them. They're actually giving me a bit of practice for another project I have in mind—anime related but not Gintama. **

**Anyway—favorite, follow, review, and all that good stuff! See ya next time!**

**Bye-nii—**

**Oh!**

**I also have a little question that I'll be doing for every chapter. It'll be the same, simple question—so nothing much, I just wanna know something! ^_^**

**_Which POV did you like the best this chapter?_**

**For real now. Bye-nii~!**


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